Sanity Notes #035: Stop robbing the world of your voice
That voice in your head is a liar; on owning your voice and offering your gift to the world
Looking for some support? If now is the time to consider coaching (or a CEO peer circle) reach out here.
I was recently in a coaching session with a woman who holds a leadership role at a Fortune 100 company. We were exploring the complexity she experiences navigating work and parenthood. One idea that came up was her doing some writing about the experience. Her initial response was, “Who am I to write about these challenges? Who would want to read what I have to say?” My immediate thought was, “Probably millions of people!”
At the same time, I felt a deep empathy for her. I’ve been wrestling with my own voice lately. While I’ve written hundreds of blog posts over the last decade, it has never been easy. Every time I sit down to write, there’s a voice in my head saying:
Don’t write today. You don’t have anything worthwhile to say. And nobody is going to read it anyway.
Every post I’ve ever written was in spite of that voice—it’s never absent.
This morning, I was facilitating a CEO circle where participants shared how they first connected with Sanity. Each of them, coincidentally, found us through something I wrote about founder burnout. What they didn’t know was how much their stories spoke to me.
I’ve been carrying shame about how difficult writing has been for me this year, and how often I’ve let that voice win. How many days I’ve failed to write, edit, or hit that publish button.
The voice tells me it’s selfish to write—that I’m exercising some weird kind of pride or self-aggrandizement. Who are you to write? the voice asks.
But I’ve come to realize that daring to write isn’t the problem. The problem is giving into the voice and withholding from the world what is mine to offer. I don’t need to be the next Hemingway, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, or Brené Brown. I just need to offer what’s authentically mine to give.
I wish the same for that leader. To her question Who would want to read about my struggles balancing work and motherhood? I say, “A ton of people!” I want to give her a hug and tell her, me too, I struggle with this too. It doesn’t matter if one person reads it or one million. The offering itself is the thing.
Finding our voice and sharing it is first of service to us. Whether through writing, painting, speaking, or another medium, finding and owning your voice is healing to you—and helpful to the world.
It’s easy to question whether what we have to offer is enough. But we must remember that everyone who ever changed a life or the world did so by getting their offering out there—by moving beyond the question Who am I to offer anything?
Offering my voice is my birthright, and it’s yours too. Whatever you’re experiencing, whatever lessons or stories your life has created, they’re worth sharing. To withhold them from the world is to rob others of the benefit of your gift.
So today, I’m recommitting to writing with abandon. To trusting that by sharing my story, my learnings, and even my unanswered questions, someone will be helped—and I will be too.
If you feel stuck finding your voice—whether in leadership, your craft, your art, or anywhere else—I’d love to hear about it. You’re not alone.
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With love from LA,
Matt
Looking for some support? If now is the time to consider coaching (or a CEO peer circle) reach out here.
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